worst feeling in the world? the moment when ur sitting there and actually wake up to realize you don't know where the hell you are in life...i dont wanna go thru this again...ive lost just about everything taht means something to me...everything in the last entry is still pretty much in the same standing...im not gonna start talkin about suicide or whatever...i know im too much of a chicken shit and it would make me sound like a fucking retard...i need to move on with stuff...i gotta stop with the bar shit...i gotta stop with kenny...i gotta stop being stupid and make a life for myself or im never gonna get anywhere...i fell in love with the wrong person...even he says im too good for him...maybe i should take a hint...im 18 fucking years old...time to wake up....ive lost all my friends...they dont give a shit...im so alone right now...what a fucking loser i am....im such a loser...all i do is hurt myself on a daily basis...my whole life is disappearing before my eyes...no ones gonna read this...no one is gonna care...no one is gonna help...if im so fucking wonderful like everyone likes to tell me and fill me full of bullshit with then why cant i find someone to love me? why am i such a loser...why dont i have the motivation to make anything go right...god im such a fucking retard...i wish i could disappear